Good Bye & Hello

I think I've got my blog block figured out, just in time to say good bye to 2012 and hello to 2013.

I let a remark get under my skin.  And it tainted everything I tried to write.  

But today...something is different.  

I've been reminded of why I write. 

To whom I write...

And that I'm called to write...even when I'm misunderstood.  Even when others read between lines that were not meant to be read between.  Even when false assumptions are made, and people disagree.  

It's a life lesson, really.  Who will control me?  Who will control what I'm called to do?  Will it be my God, or will it be random people?  Who will I fear?  Who will I please?  

God reminded my heart that of course some are not going to get it.  Of course some are going to disagree.  Of course some are going make assumptions.  And He gave me my spunk back, by whispering...who cares?  So what?

Just write.  

And so I will.  *smile*

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Trying to Figure it Out

You know you have some issues when you've started several posts, but have yet to finish them because you can't quite say what you really want to say in the way you want to say it.

I'm working through that..and it has to do with this blog.  And when I figure it out, I'll let you know. ;)

Maybe just posting this will help...

In the mean time, have a very Merry Christmas!

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Fine By Me

Eli had a school Christmas concert on Monday night.  My boys loathe vocal concerts.  I'm afraid they've inherited that from me.  Anyways.  We don't generally make the boys dress up for church except on holidays...and even then I use the term "dressed up" loosely.  Eli, by far my most easy-going child, muttered under his breath while I made him tuck in his shirt and clip on his tie.  

And then, he caught a glimpse of himself as he passed by the full length mirror in the hallway.  I watched him back up and do a double take.  He cracked a smile, acknowledging that even if the clothes weren't the most comfortable...they did make him look extra handsome.  

Funny how that works.

As we walked into the concert he informed me he wouldn't actually be singing but rather just moving his lips.  I think he was surprised to hear me say "Fine by me!"  Little does he know, I've mouthed my way through many a concerts myself.  

He did an excellent job of pretending to sing.  Nice work, buddy.  

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We Go Out...

Ben and I had the lovely opportunity to attend a beautiful wedding not long ago.  We got dressed up and then left all the kids in the care of Grandma and Grandpa, which means we actually enjoyed the wedding.

Fun times.

After the wedding, when I looked at these pictures, I realized I had totally skipped my eyeliner and mascara.  Whoops.  I guess it meant that nothing smeared all over my face after I cried watching my two sweet little nephews walk down the aisle as the ring bearers.  Seriously, they were so sweet I bawled.  I'm not the only one that does that?  Right?

One of the songs in the wedding was Brandon Heath's, Love Never Fails.  So now it's at the top of my playlist because it's one of my new favorites.  Even though it's not new at all.

I love weddings.  And the bride and groom were beautiful and handsome but you'll have to take my word for it because I forgot my camera.  Loser.

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In Gear

I've sorta been working my butt off to make Christmas enjoyable this year.  Makes sense, right?

I'm a procrastinator at heart.  And action.  Whatever.  But so far I have several key Christmas presents currently purchased or on their way from my beloved Amazon AND my Christmas cards are being sent via Snapfish as. we. speak.

See, I told ya.  I am a Christmas Overachiever this year. 

Also, the most expensive cut down tree that we've ever purchased (thank you drought of 2012) is currently on display in our old kitchen.  Which hasn't been remodeled yet, but you know how it is after you live with something for long enough you just learn to ignore stuff?  Well, we ignore the cupboards and sink that no longer works.  Back to the point:  I've even watched a couple Christmas movies.  Elf and A Very Brady Christmas.  Good times.

I'm hoping to soak it all in this year.  Even if it is crazy fast.  We're even attempting to do Ann Voskamps Jesse Tree Avent Calendar.  It's amazing & free.  And by attempting, I mean we've already had to combine days because we missed some because we're like that.  I want to build the anticipation of Jesus' birth.  Because it's about Him.  And along the way, I want to enjoy the celebrations and hoopla and crazy that go along with it. 

Tis the season...

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Stuck

So.  Forever ago (October 19th to be exact) I told you that TOMORROW I would tell you about one of my favorite Bible Studies that our group is currently doing...

And tomorrow turned into December 2nd.  My bad.  

But I can say, that I'm further into the study than I was back in October and it.is.so.good.

It's called STUCK.

One of the best ways I can describe it, is that God has used it as a sort of means of bringing refining, and purifying to my spiritual life.  It assaulted all my "good enough" perceptions of myself.  It made me look at areas of my life, my personality, with a fresh perspective...or a fresh dose of reality.  And a lot of what I saw in me needed to be surrendered.  Crucified.

It's interesting though.  Much like what happens when someone is presented with the Gospel of Christ...their hearts are softened or hardened by it's message, I've noticed that through this study, dealing with these areas of sin causes us to either soften and repent or bristle and ignore.  Whether we like to admit it or not, it's a reflection of our spiritual condition.  I love a study that can do that.  One that can cut to the quick of God's calling for us. 

It's so very good. 

  

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I'm Alive and Well

You know you've ignored your blog for too long when you start receiving emails and questions about your well-being.  

Sorry about that.

November was an interesting month.  And I wish there was a way to blog about some of the things I learned, experienced, and grew from...but there's no way to do it in a way that remains general enough.  My life is too "small" to be vague enough.  And so this past month will be one of those lessons that I have to learn from and then keep private...because that's just how blogging works sometimes. 

Blogging can be tricky., because like any writer, you're putting yourself out there for not only encouragement, but ridicule as well.  You run the risk that people are going to misunderstand your words, your heart, your intentions.  I think anyone that has blogged for a significant amount of time can attest to this.  It's just part of the deal.  That's hard to overcome sometimes.  And sometimes it just seems easier to shut-up.  Lock down.  And then something happens...

Emails.  Thoughtful questions and concerns.  And the Holy Spirit's gentle reminder that there's a purpose in the writing.

There's a purpose in the writing.  And my purpose is not to be understood by people...it's to share my journey.  My journey.  So I'm going to get back at that.  

Thanks for hanging around for it. :)

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