Not the Same

So...


This time last year I was either throwing up, or laying on the couch feeling like throwing up.  Little Lucy was the cause of those good times.  


And maybe you remember (because I beat it like a dead horse) that I had trained that summer to run a little half-marathon and then couldn't because the barfing made me dehydrated like 2 days before the race.  I was so bummed.


Funny how things change in a year.


This time last year she was a little person that consisted of a clump of cells, and now she is this:

This time last year I was ready to run a half-marathon.  This year, I ran that race...but in a relay.  My leg of it was a whole 3 miles.  It hurt.  I'm not a racer...I like to run at a leisurely pace. The desire to run further is gone.  The desire to run at all is dwindling.  I'm trying to make myself like it again, but it's just not happening.  Wishing my feelings would catch up to my actions.


So much changes in a year.  Some for the better.  Some not.  I find that I'm sort of trying to figure out where I fit and where stuff fits.  Prioritizing.  Trying to fit back into my "pre-baby-girl" life is just not working how I thought it would.  Kinda like my jeans.  They technically fit, but just don't feel quite the same.


I wouldn't change a thing.  Lucy has blessed our family beyond words.  It's like she's always been a part of us, or at least was always meant to be a part of us.  I look in the mirror and I see a different person than I saw a year ago. And I like her, but I'm also getting to know her to.  She's different.   

• I'm a mother of 4.  
• I'm no longer the mama of boys, but the mama of "the boys & Lucy"
• I've been the youngest in my group of friends in tiny town, but our kids were all similar ages...now I have a baby, and the dynamics change.
• Running has now become a group activity.  I used to like it and my friends didn't.  Now, they're all into it and I'm, well...not.
• I've even decided to grow my hair out for awhile.  I KNOW!  

It's interesting how changes in life, physical or emotional change who we are.  Part of me misses my old self.  And part of me is looking forward to getting to know the new one better.  Part of me just wants everything to return to the "normal" I knew, and part is looking forward to the possibilities ahead.  The one thing I can't escape...is that it means change.  I am not the Sarah I was a year ago.  Sure, a lot of me is, but a lot of me is not.  It means changes in my real life, and likely changes in blog life.  

I'm done trying to fit back in.  I'm ready for the new.  Ready to be open to the possibilities God has in store for me.  Bring it.  

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The Joy of My Life...

Riddle me this:  What does it say about me, when the below pictured item, made me absolutely giddy?

This lovely gate, which , by the way, I made two trips to Wal-Mart in the same day (once with one child, the next time with 5) just to purchase it.  Don't forget, I live in tiny-town...Wal-Mart is not next door.  The first time I didn't think they carried one long enough.  So I checked two other nearby stores.  Nada.  But, turns out, had I talked to my husband before my first trip, he could have suggested hooking it to the cupboard then, making the gate at Wal-Mart totally doable. 


Answer to Riddle:  I watch a couple of one year olds a few days a week.  I have a Basset Hound that can't resist food on the counter.  I have three boys who can't seem to remember to stay out of the (tiny) kitchen while I'm cooking.  


Who knew a small gate could fix all my problems?  ;)

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Moving On...

Last week was one of those horrible, ugly, can't-wait-till-it's-over kind of weeks.


I had strep.  Jake had strep.  Blah blah blah.  We're all glad to move on from it.


I have a deadline looming over my head for some ministry related projects...which is a fancy way of saying I've procrastinated until the last possible minute and if I don't get my butt in gear and write/mail some letters no one will show up to our Wed. night kids program or ladies Bible study because they won't even know it's started yet.


More later...

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Oh Dog...

Dear Gus,


I realize that you haven't lived here all that long.  But, you are a smart dog.  You save the naughty behavior for when I'm gone.  I know you do.  It's why I have to lock the garbage in the mud room, block off the couch, the stairs, and remove the cushions off the chairs so that you won't sleep on them (have you noticed you smell badly?)   

I need you to give me a break.  Leaving the house with three boys and a baby is tricky enough...and occasionally I forget one of the four steps to Gus-proof the parsonage.  I like you Gus, I do.  But...if I come home to find this one. more. time.  You are sooooo getting more than my angry eyes.  We clear?

I didn't think so.

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I've Conquered Math

Happy Birthday Ben!

Ben was preaching on Sunday, and I couldn't help but look at him and think to myself that I've loved that guy for so, so long.  


I noticed him, a few months before my 15th birthday.  I've shared the story somewhere before on this blog, and if I weren't so lazy I'd find it for you, but eh...I'm lazy.  


As he was preaching I was thinking back about time.  We dated five years before we got married.  That five years seemed like forever.  Now...five years flies by like crazy.  And then I had a revelation:  Teenage dating years are to be measured in dog years.  Ya know....x7.


Because if you're a teenager and your relationship can survive the angst and drama and immaturity, then 1 is = to 7.  For sure.  It's only logical.  I can't believe it took me that long to figure it out.  


I have no idea why I did so badly in math, because now it's just all clicking together for me!  Amazing, no?


So, technically, we dated 35 years before getting married.  And we've been married 12.  That's 47 years together so far.  Which is pretty amazing considering Ben just turned 35 today.


It's been a good 47 years.  Happy Birthday to the amazing guy I've loved longer than I've been alive...technically.

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I Love Lucy

Before this week, I had never watched the beloved television show, I Love Lucy.  Crazy, no?   Since I did, after all, name my baby girl Lucy.  And since Lucille Ball is probably the most famous of Lucys' (next to the bratty Charlie Brown one) I thought I should culturize myself a bit.  I'm not sure why, exactly, that I'd never seen it, but I think it may be the fact that I can't stand to watch anything that is not in color.  


I'm lame, I can't help it.  Don't even ask me how many times I've skipped the first part of The Wizard of Oz, just to get to the color part.  


But his week, I happened to find I Love Lucy on the Hallmark channel and so I've been DVRing it.  Turns out, I happen to quite enjoy it!  


But I do have a question.  How old are Lucy and Ricky supposed to be in the show?  Because I can't tell.  The black and white and the clothing styles throw me off a bit.  Please help a girl out.


Oh, and when googling, I found this t-shirt that I may have to order for Ben. :)


On an entirely different subject (other than her name)...


I bought Lucy a excersaucer thingy at WalMart this week.  I'd previously told myself I wouldn't because they're so big and I don't have room.  BUT.  I'm desperate for something to entertain her, other than me holding her in an upright position so she can see everything that's going on.  This one is smaller, and better yet, it was a whole $22. 

She likes it!!  Yay for 10 minutes for me to get something done.  

She's got some room to grow into it.  

*"Lucy" image courtesy of google images*

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Kind of a Boring Update...

I probably have 5 minutes before Little Miss Lucy decides her can-it-really-even-be-called-a-nap-because-it's-so-stinkin'-short "nap" is over.  Let's see how much I can cram in.

1. It's my mom's birthday today.  She's 51.  I only tell you this, because she loves to point out everyones ages...and she always makes me a year older than I really am.  (that sentence will make her smile:)  Happy Birthday Mom!!  Love you.
2. Boys are all back in school and enjoying it.  
3. Lucy turned 4 months.  She's 13 pounds.  Which makes her 2 pounds smaller than Eli and Jake were at this age, and 6 pounds smaller than Noah was.  Her and Jake both had their check-ups/shots yesterday.  They both did great.  Dairy Queen was involved as a bribe.
4. Her smile that will make you want to eat her up:

Of course blogger would choose to not rotate my picture today.

5.  Running (post pregnancy) was...lets say...miserable feeling for awhile.  I just didn't feel like doing it.  And although I've kept at it, much whining was involved.  But this week, I think I've turned a corner, both physically and mentally.  Pushing through the 4-mile wall of torture feels like a breakthrough.  After that wall, the rest of the run doesn't feel quite so bad.  For this week anyways. 

6. I have succumbed to drinking regular pop again.  I know, I know...I'm so weak.  Worse yet, I don't even care about its high fructose corn syrup.  I'll leave you with that super exciting piece of info...and speaking of pop, I could use one right about now...

I made it through 6 things and Lucy is still sleeping!  Wheee!

So, what's new with you?  Tell me what I've missed.

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