Weird Dreams

Towards the end of each of my pregnancies I had weird dreams about the baby. I mean weird.

With my first, Noah, I remember dreaming that Ben and I were at a big stadium for some event and I had to go to the bathroom. I looked and looked and finally found one and as I sat on the toilet the baby just came out, IN THE TOILET. Oh, it gets better. When I turned around to get my first-born out of the public toilet, I was shocked to see that he wasn't actually human, but a baby piglet.

I awoke in a cold sweat, because weirdly enough the dream seemed completely real. I remember being so relieved when I felt my still huge belly, confirming the fact I had not actually given birth to a pig in a toilet at a stadium.

Although, the idea of the baby "just coming out" would have been nice.

Anyways. I am not pregnant. However, I am expecting a teenage daughter to arrive in less than two months now...and the dreams are starting.

How weird is that?

Saturday night I dreamt that she got here and couldn't speak English and I couldn't understand anything she said! And I couldn't figure it out, because we'd emailed back and forth for months and I had understood everything. The kicker though, everyone else could understand her...EXCEPT me!

Last night I dreamt that she'd arrived at the airport but we were having all kinds of trouble getting there to pick her up. Fist we were at the wrong one, then I couldn't get everyone rounded up again to get to the next airport, and then we couldn't find the way and everything seemed to be in slow motion and I just kept thinking SHE'S WAITING AND WE'RE NOT THERE! WE ARE TERRIBLE PARENTS! :)

Did I mention before I got married I kept dreaming my teeth became too large for my mouth and then all crumbled and fell out? Good times.

*image courtesy of google images*

Pin It

The Opposite of Deep Thoughts

Because I feel like  boring you...

• I cannot stop thinking about the last chapter of The Bible Study we finished.  Self-Control.  I went through it at a snails pace, trying to soak it all in.  I keep reading and re-reading it in hopes that it will consume me until I actually start doing it.  Beth Moore says it best, "Many times we don't have a knowledge problem, we have an obedience problem."  Yep...that would be me.
• Ran 6 miles last night faster than normal and it felt great!  Weird how that happens.  I'll attribute it to these little tasty things.   I'm still trying to get the hang of eating them while running without choking on their sugary goodness.
• My baby boy turns FOUR tomorrow.  Why four already?!?  Just yesterday...
• Turns out saying I'm going to take a break from blogging actually makes me feel free to blog.  Weird.
• I'm going to start writing down everything I eat in order to shock my brain out of denial about what I'm really eating.  My poor brain...it's in for a rude awakening.  
• I'm off to Wal-Mart with 3 boys.  Good times.  You can bet that along the way I will mull over whether or not I will swing by Starbucks and 

1. spend too much money on a sugary delicious drink.
2. then be forced to write it down in my new Dwight Schrutte notebook that I bought at Target because I totally thought it would be perfect for my new food journal.
3. both try to remember and forget what Beth Moore had to say about self-control.
4. wish I didn't really have a free will and that God would just make me do as I should...it would be so much easier, no?

Happy Friday!

Pin It

Spandex

Last Saturday was another 7 mile run on the training schedule.  It hurt.  I didn't particularly like it. A point that I probably mentioned to my running partner, Billie, about 234 times...approximately.   Granted, I think most of the time she couldn't hear me because of her ipod, but still.

Any of you who have a running partner, or any kind of exercising partner know that it is a unique relationship.  You sweat, hurt, push, sympathize, complain, laugh, and overcome...together.  

There's a raw honesty.  No pretenses.  No facades.  

We talk about things on the trail that I would not likely share with anyone else...mostly dealing with weird bodily stuff that occurs while running.  Like what, you ask?  Can't tell you...because there's a rule.

What's said on the trail...stays on the trail.

Ok, well not everything has to stay on the trail.  We had a little conversation about Spandex that I thought I would highlight for you.  

It all started because we'd overheard someone make a comment about a recent 5k walk/run.  The walkers were a little "put-off" by the runners need to wear such tight clothing.  This is particularly amusing to me, because my non-runner self used to think the exact. same. thing.

I figured all those runners I saw in their Spandex were just showing off.  And while I passed them in my mini-van, while munching on french fries, I thought, c'mon people...we know you're not lazy, but do you really need to rub it in with the spandex?!?

And then I became a runner who ran for longer than five miles...and then I GOT it.

Here's the deal on Spandex:

• It is not an option when running long distances...it is a necessity.
• Loose, cotton clothing does ONE thing when running for a long time...it rubs.  It chafes.  It causes unmentionable soreness in unmentionable places...get my drift?!?  
• The only people that actually look good in spandex are Olympic athletes.  Period.

There's something else I've learned too.  Runners have no shame.  Pride is checked at the door when headed out for a run.  I wear stuff out that door that, if I were not totally distracted by the process of running, I would NEVER be caught dead in.  But when I head out for that run...it's about the run and whatever it's gonna take to make the process a little more comfortable.  

It's the only time in my life that comfort trumps cuteness.  *smile*

Pin It

Just For a Time...

Have you ever notice how your blog sort of takes on a life of it's own?  Mine has.  At least if feels that way.  It started as a place to just sort of journal when I felt like it...and then actual readers come along.  And then readers and bloggers became friends...who knew!?!?  And when I don't blog, I feel outta the bloggy world loop...as if I'm missing something.

And then I start to wonder...am I running my blog, or is it running me?   

And here's my dilemma.  It's summer.  It's tons-o-fun.  I love all my readers and blogs I read, I really, REALLY do.  But no matter how fun blog-life is...it can't compare to real life, which is just so much better.  

SO, I'm stepping back a little for Summer time.  I'll still be here to fill your lives with information that you really didn't even need to know, it just won't be as often...maybe a couple times a week. 

Your mind will thank me later.

My reading and commenting on your posts is likely to be less than stellar as well.   No worries though...come the end of summer I'll be back in full swing.  

I just didn't want you to think I was snubbing you.

Or being rude...I hate rudeness.

Or that some natural disaster had decided to strike.

Or that I'd fallen of the face of the earth. 

I'm just enjoying my family,warm weather, green grass, the public pool, and hot dogs at the baseball diamond.

Speaking of hot dogs...last night at the t-ball game I ate a hot dog and nachos for supper.  It's amazing what I'll eat in order to not have to cook.  God bless Mondays for the month of June...and God bless t-ball games....and Summer.

Did I mention I love Summer?  

ONE more thing...it is now officially LESS than 2 months till Julie comes!

*image courtesy of google images

Pin It

Let's Discuss...

Let's pretend I have some deep thoughts.  *cough*

In no particular order:

• When did the word "piss"  become not a bad word!?!  I missed the memo on that one.  Everyone is saying it lately...and it makes me cringe a little.  In my head...still a bad word.  I've even tried  being cool about it...after all, I know language changes over time.  I'm guilty of using the word "crap" which I'm pretty sure used to be less than kosher to say. Still, I'm gonna admit, I can't get used to it.  In this house:  Still a bad word. 
• Last day of school.  Hip Hip Hooray!  
• Have to go to Wal Mart...boo.
• My friend Sarah introduced me to the songs below.  I can't even tell you how much I love them!  Peppy little tunes, I tell you.
• I love Fridays.  
• I haven't had coffee yet...need to go make some...please excuse me...

Happy Weekend!

Love these.  

Pin It

I'm Done.

It seems to be the phrase I hear myself repeating lately.  I find myself throwing my arms in the air and saying...I'm Done.

As in...

• about 6:00 every night...I'm done.
• a bossy almost four year old...I'm done.
• a six year old that is using words he shouldn't...I'm done.
• little boys that do not listen when I speak...I'm done.
• the routine of school, bedtime, homework...I'm done.
• rain and cloudiness...I'm done.
• a house and vehicle that no matter how hard I try, just do not stay clean...I'm done.
• brothers whining and fighting...I'm done.

I don't actually get to be done.  

I don't even want to be done.  

But I do reach that point...daily...where circumstances push me to the limit of my patience.  Sometimes I just need to step back, put myself in time-out and be done for a few moments.  

My ipod has helped in the I'm Done department.  I can stick that baby on and listen to something positive (instead of my own self pity;)...and it works.  God works through it.

Here's what I love lately:

• Podcasts by Matt Chandler, Pastor of The Village Church.  It's free to subscribe to at itunes.  They make me laugh, cry, and have brought me to my knees in repentance.  Good stuff.
• Latest favorite song...which I didn't really like at first, and now love.  Go figure.   

It's amazing what a little change in perspective does.  

I think it's OK to have those I'm Done moments.    I don't know any mom who has not had those moments...daily.  We're human...whether we admit it or not.  I love those little boys of mine...but it doesn't mean they don't push me to the edge sometimes.  Mommahood is constant.  Whether you work full time or stay at home, you're always a momma.  You're always thinking about them, loving them, disciplining them, providing for them.  You can't shut it off.  

I can't think of anything harder...or better than it.  And I'm praying God's amazing hand of patience and gentleness over this momma as I prepare for a summer full- O- fun.  Because I'm gonna need it.  *wink*

Pin It

Significant

We had a new kind of Memorial Weekend this year. If you were reading this blog last May, you might remember the ginormous tornado that went through part of tiny town the day before Memorial day.


Last year we spent the day picking through what little remained of our friends home. I remember feeling like I was in the middle of a bad dream... that surely I'd wake up any moment and find everything back to the way it should be. Instead, I woke up to this.
This is our friends house today. They moved back in a week ago. It's beautiful and even better than before! I took this picture from here:
This is the cemetery that was leveled during the tornado (Ben is in the suit:) Headstones were knocked over and all the big pine trees...gone. Since last year, new trees have been planted and the cemetery restored. It was an experience I can't put into words...standing there this year, remembering those who've given their lives for our country, so that I have the freedoms that I enjoy, and at the same time take for granted...I am so thankful for their sacrifice and for the country that God has placed my family.

He is so faithful. Tiny town is being restored. Despite a tornado and massive flooding, this little town, that many view as insignificant is moving forward...growing stronger. Because God views it as significant. The lives of the people here are significant to Him. I am thankful for a God that doesn't need the high and mighty, but shows Himself powerful through the seemingly insignificant.

It's interesting how after we've talked about life-devastating events for so long we can talk about them with little emotional reaction. I see it all the time. People mention, in passing, circumstances that at the time rocked them to the core...disasters, loss of loved ones, betrayal, sickness.


During the trauma we can barely think of it without the pain overwhelming us. But as time goes on, and healing begins, we begin to talk about it as though we're now removed from it a little bit. Yet, when we allow ourselves to really go back there...really remember it, the emotions tend to come back.


Yesterday was a day to remember. And the emotions came back...but now, instead of just hurt and loss, there is hope and progress and healing.


Sometimes, we need to be completely weakened in order to become stronger. It's not how we like it to be done...but often it's true.


Today we are stronger.

Pin It