Let's Catch Up...

Let's just sorta ignore the fact that I took a 3 1/2 month break from blogging, sound good?  I thought so.

Lot's has happened, and much has stayed the same.  Life is tricky like that. (but my love of run-on sentences is still strong. Sorry not sorry.)

Let's bullet for old times sake:

• Lucy turned 4 in April.  Noah turned 13 in May. Jake turned 9 last week. Eli is still 11, but now has glasses.  
  
   
• School is out and we are in full swing of Summer.  Which is actually as busy as the school year, but a different kind of busy so we are sucking-out every ounce of fun and warmth that it has to offer.  I did stay in bed til 8 this morning...so it's not that busy.
• I am in week 1 of a 12 week training plan for my second half-marathon.  Last year I did a 20 week training plan.  Pffff.  Apparently I think 12 weeks is going to cut it this time.  We shall see.  I've likely deceived myself.  
• I got my hair cut super short.  Pixie time.  So in the hair department, much has changed since last June.  It's super easy and super fun to have something different. And super easy.  (Super is such a great word, I love to over-use it.)  I am amazed at how many ladies tell me they would "love to do it, but just couldn't."  Umm:  Yes you can.  It's simple really.  1. Scroll through Pinterest for hours 2. Show your stylist the pic 3. Done.  Be brave people, you can do it.  (But don't tell your husband I said so...)
•  I have leaned so much in the past 6 months about ministry and living life as a follower of Jesus.  So much.  And in the midst of it, it didn't seem appropriate to share...but now, I think it is.  It has required some bravery that I wasn't quite sure I was capable of.  And I'm not.  But Christ in me, is completely capable.  Different songs have become anthems for me.  Here's a link to one of them. 
• Julie graduated college in May.  And part of her family came from Norway to visit and stay with us and they were so very lovely. And then she flew back to Norway.  *sob* And I miss her.  But she will be back.  (this is not necessarily confirmed, but nothing is impossible soooo it' s how I cope.  It's working.) 
• Ok, so that's that.  
  
  I sat down at the computer yesterday and opened up a Word doc to write down some specific thoughts on something.  And the writing...it felt gooood.  Writing and running = good cheap therapy.  
  
  I haven't met anyone yet who couldn't use some of that. ;)
  
  So, my internet friends, what have you been up to?  *tapping the mic*  Beuller?  Beuller?  

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Desperate

 We had a blizzard warning yesterday and lost electricity for awhile last night.  
My kids are home for their up-teenth snow and/or wicked cold day, this year.

And I spent the morning google-ing churches in Georgia that might need a pastor.  

I have no idea why I picked Georgia, annnnd it's not exactly the best way to find a church.  But my heart is desperate to escape the cold winter.  Desperate enough that uprooting my whole family and moving across the country seems legit.

My wiser self would tell you that making life-changing decisions during times of desperation is a really.bad.idea.  

My sick-of-winter self says...so.what.

And as I was google-ing...I couldn't escape a little tune, to a little verse that I learned not long after I was saved.  

This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.  Psalm 118:24

Rejoice and be glad.

Meh.

It's the opposite of what my heart wants to do in winter.  It's always the opposite of what my heart wants to do in situations where the misery feels like it will never end.  

And so I choose.  And I have to choose constantly to rely on truth rather than my feelings. To be glad in the day before me.  No matter the weather, my circumstances, or my feelings.  Sometimes I fail miserably at that.  And I google and make plans to become a Southerner.  (My town will resemble Blue Belle like in Hart of Dixie.  Reality much?)

And God gently redirects my ever wandering heart...

I have to choose rejoicing and gladness because if I don't...I end up bringing further misery in the end.

Winter will end.  Winter will end. Say it with me, Winter will end.

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Tights are Not Pants

It's Friday.  ThankyouJesus.

I just like Fridays.  And weekends.  

And I blogged 12 times this month, which is the most in lots and lots of months.  

And tomorrow...January is OVER.  And February is short and March is basically spring, even if it's still cold and snowy here, I will put my winter coat away.  

Ya Hoo!

And a friendly reminder for this weekend, and every day always:  Tights are not pants.  Either are leggings.  Cover the tush.

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Is it Over Yet?

Sorry for the silence.  I've been busy moping around about the Polar Vortex that I'm living in.  

January is not my favorite month.  It's not even in the top 12. *cough*  But there's only three days left and I will survive.  

I gave myself a pep talk this morning...but I wasn't impressed enough with it to actually be peppy.

There are some good, very good, things going on this January.  The weather is not one of them.  

• Something I've been praying for, for almost a year:  Happened.  Yay!  One of those situations where I've been praying, but "feeling" like that it would never happen...and then it does and I sit back in awe as God says to me, "Look what I can do!"  
• It's not crazy like December.  Bonus.
• People I love have January birthdays and that is good.
• The cabin fever has made me organize, and paint, and rearrange furniture.  I'll have to get you pictures.  Eventually. 
• My husband and I have a little get-away planned, and that is good. :)  
• We are definitely getting an espresso machine.  And french press.  
• January is almost over. 

That's all I can think of.  My brain is frozen.  I just keep drinking pots of coffee to stay warm.

Stay warm people.

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Because Random is Best

I got nothing but random today.  Or any day.

• Blogger is not letting me put my instagram pictures in a post today and that is annoying.
• We have another Winter Weather Advisory.  Lame. Winter is wretched.
• Yesterday I signed up for a local race thing called the Triple Crown.  Which means I will be running a 5k in April, a 10k in July, and a half-marathon in September.  It makes me have that excited/nervous gut feeling.  
• I am in awe of what God is doing in our church right now.  And that is cool.  
• I mentioned Made to Crave the other day.  I'm down 5 pounds in 2 weeks, mostly because I realized how much I was going to poor-food-choices for wrong reasons.  I realized I have a few entitlement issues when it comes to sugar. The "I Want + I Can = I Should"  Bigfatlie. I'm learning to battle that with God's truth, which is so much different than battling them with self control.  It's that 1 Corinthians 10:23 idea that even though it may be permissible, it doesn't mean it's beneficial.  Changing my way of thinking and doing is going to take much longer that losing a few more pounds, I guarantee that.  
• Lucy just dug through all the cupboards because she didn't believe me that we were out of Nutella.  I wonder who she inherited that from? 
• The new way of blogging is still weird to me.  I'm not a fan.  I'm really uncomfortable with all the self promotion it takes.  It's totally fine for other bloggers...it's just not me.  I really don't care about page views.  I just want to write uninteresting stuff, with unprofessional pictures and offer very little "How-To's."  And that's what I'm gonna do. The rest of the internet calls it "How to Kill Your Blog."    So be it. 
• I love blogging. Old School.  
• You have a lovely day!

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Txtng

google images

I am, without a doubt, old-school.  Whatever that means.  Once I learn something, I want to do it that way forever.  I'm not opposed to learning new things, I'm just opposed to learning a new way to do them once I've already learned them.

Tracking with me?  

And if I learned to do something wrong in the first place, it's highly unlikely I'll be able to figure out the right way.  Ever.  My left-handed Grandma, taught my right-handed self to crochet.  Sort of.  I've still never been able to recover.  Re-train myself?  That's funny.

Maybe it's that I'm now 36 years old...or that my children are dangerously close to teenagerhood...or that I'm trying to figure out the new means of technology that is ever evolving...but I just need for everyone and everything to *pause* while I catch up.  

But maybe the issue is that I don't want to catch up?  Let's talk texting.

My introverted self loves text messaging.  It's short and quick and to the point.  Kind of.   But the abbreviated words and lack of punctuation?  It leaves me...highly irritated.  

What's the deal?!  Every time I see "Thx" I die a little.  And I think to myself, if they were really thankful, they'd write the 'anks' instead of 'x'.  *smile* Or '2' instead of 'to' I mean really, is the extra letter, so hard?  

Mostly I hate that it takes my brain longer to decode their short-cuts than it would to just read the full word.  Now, I do use shortcuts occasionally, I'm not gonna lie...but I have to be in a pretty big hurry to annoy.

Someone needs to invent an app that translates the abbreviations into real words, so that those who feel the need to abbreviate every word don't annoy old people like me.  Maybe, I just need an app that sends a message to the person texting me that my phone will only accept texts that contain less than 2% abbreviations.  

Until then, I've just added the abbreviators to my list of "People I Rarely Text" Instead, I'll call or email and then I can like them again.  heh.

I have a couple other issues with texting...but one post can only hold so much snark.  I'll save it for tomorrow.  

L8R *eye roll*

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Barfing Preaches

Hello again!

Christmas in general is craziness around here (just like everywhere else.) Add into that sickness among all of us and..BLEH.  

I didn't drink coffee for four days.  That's how bad.  

But as I sit here, I'm sporting my 20 oz coffee mug and life is good again.  

Being sick does something really important.  It gives me a big-fat-dose of perspective.  It's like God's reminder to me of how weak I really am.  And how little I really do on my own.  Take my health away and I have little to offer as far as accomplishments.  Nothing actually.  

And this bout of sickness taught me something new.  Barfing preaches.  I got sick very late on Christmas night.  I'll spare you the details, sorta, but it was not nice.  I felt gross all night, and then in the morning the barfing finally came.

*and this is a side-note, but DUDE how does that stuff stay in your stomach for so long?!  I hadn't eaten for a good 15 hours and when the barfing started I thought, "Oh good, I haven't eaten much so I don't have very much to throw up" but NO. I was wrong* 

I feel like we need to talk about barfing for a sec.  There's different kinds of barfing.  The kind where you barf fairly soon after you eat and it's super gross because it's mushed up food and you never wanna eat that food again for as long as you live.  But then two days go by and you find yourself eating pizza again.  And then there is the acid-barfing.  Where you haven't eaten for a long time but your stomach is full of acid and bile and other grossness and when you barf that.  Ouch.  It burns like none other and leaves your throat super sore.

So, I had the acid-barfing.  *shudder*  Aren't you glad you stopped by today?  A few hours afterwards, I was super thirsty, but dreaded the thought of drinking anything.  I grabbed a bottled water out of the fridge, twisted the cap off and took a tiny sip.

It was the worst tasting water ever.  

Of course it wasn't really the water that was the problem.  It was perfectly fine and the same water that I always drink and have no problem with.  If my family were to grab a bottle, and give it a swig, they would think it was great.

The water tasted bad because of my circumstances.  My experience.  It tasted bad because of a very real event:  Acid barfing.  

And then it hit me.  A very real truth that sometimes the Gospel, Jesus...tastes very bad to people.  Believers and unbelievers alike.  Sometimes life circumstances or beliefs or whatever distort what really is.  

The water I was tasting was the same water as usual, its taste hadn't changed literally, but my taste for it had.  Someone could have argued with me about the taste of the water, but would that have changed how it tasted to me?  

Absolutely not.

Sometimes, we have to figure out what's distorting our taste.  Sometimes, we need to love people and give them some time to heal from the acid-barfing of their life so they can taste again.


Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! Psalm 34:8

Because barfing preaches.

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Easton

I am not really very good at "organized thoughts."  Especially when it applies to putting together meaningful words about people I love.  And because my words feel lacking, I just post-pone it.  

I am, after all, a fantastic procrastinator.






For the past eleven months I have failed to introduce this blog to one of my favoritest little guys on the planet.  Easton.  He was only a few months old when I asked his Mama if I could blog about him. She said, "Absolutley!" and then I did...nothing.  Because I couldn't find the words.  That ends now.

Last January ended up being a whacked-out month...the kind of January that makes you sort of freaked out about what the rest of the year might hold.  There were funerals.  There were marriages in crisis.  And there was Easton.








All the details are a little fuzzy now.  The combination of time, and the emotional craziness of all the circumstances seem to blend everything together in my head.  So the exact order of stuff may be off.  

I've done child-care for Easton's big brother, Ryder, for quite some time, and when I found out his Mama was going to have another baby boy I was thrilled.

Baby boys are so very nice.  And I always am up for a baby-fix.

The weather in Iowa last January involved lots of blizzard warnings.  Little Easton entered the world during some of it.  The weather made it impossible for me to get there right away to meet Easton, and then he was put in NICU for some breathing issues.  His Mama had been keeping me posted on how he was doing, and mentioned that they were going to be doing some tests...  

I'll never forget the phone call I got from his Mama.  I was in the middle of packing up the house of one of the crisis' of that month...and decided to take her call while sitting in my van.  The tests had concluded that little Easton had Down Syndrome.   She was doing her best to be brave and strong...but it's shocking news to take in. 

I remember her saying how much she loved him...and I tried to reassure her that he was perfect.  And God designed Him...perfectly.  And the only other thing I could think of was Kelle Hampton's blog.  It felt absurd as I heard it coming out of my mouth...to tell her to go read a blog.  But when the weather causes you to walk through some devastating news all alone in a hospital, I guess you'll take the blog idea. 

Kelle walked through very similar circumstances, finding out after birth that her baby had Down Syndrome.  And sometimes, you just need words from someone who really knows the pain.  And to see them survive and thrive through it.  

Last week I finished reading Kelle's book Bloom.  Easton's Mama bought it, read it, and then donated it to Tiny Town's library...where I meant to check it out for months.  Months!  *shake my head*  I read it in two days, bawling my way through it.  The first time I had read Kelle's story, was before Easton.  My perspective is so much different now, after having this little guy around.  

I am smitten.  He is changing all of us that are blessed to be around him.  That extra chromosome makes him extra awesome.  He lights up a room.  His life is a blessing.  I'm amazed at all the ways God has already drawn people to Himself through this little guy.   I see Easton, and can't help but think, God is good.  I am so thankful his Mama shares him with me.

Today, he had a cardiac catheterization, which determined he will need surgery.  So, if you're some of my praying friends, I know his family would appreciate those prayers.  

And there will most definitely be more of that sweet little guy on this blog.  He's the only one that likes to do selfies with me. 

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Courage

I turned 36 on Monday.  I'm only a few days in to the thirty-six gig, but I gotta say: Lovin' it.

Thirty five was a good year.  It was a time of resetting-back-into-position. And although that's ultimately a good thing, the process of it is sometimes painful...and messy.  

Life has a way of getting out of order.  Suddenly non-important issues work their way up the priority scale.  And people and relationships of value slide down...because there's only room for so many at the top.  

It's amusing for me to look back.  I knew God was leading in the shake-up, but I obeyed so very timidly.  

People pleasing tendencies became exposed.  Unhealthy relationships became exposed.  I learned that dealing with both of  those, once you've allowed them to take root for awhile is...ugly.  I really don't have any other word for it.  Whenever we make changes in our lives, there is fall-out.  And usually it involves a mix of good and bad.  I wasn't quite prepared for the bad to be so bad.   

There were countless times I wanted to flee back into the false-comfort of my familiar old-way of operating.  So very many times.  And in that, God exposed my pride.  Again.  And even as I write this, part of me wants to flee back to the familiar.  To appease. To appease others to make them happier.  To shut them up.  Because it seems like a quick and easy fix.

And God is not into quick and easy.  Because quick and easy is dumb and useless.

So much of my year 35....my timid obedience of 35, was to prepare me for what He's calling me to in my 36th year of life.  And that is courage.

I  managed the obedience to the shake-up that was required, not without many mis-steps on my part, but now....this year, is about the courage to own them.

Courage to live loudly the gospel of Christ that brings hope, rather  than timidly hiding behind meaningless small-talk (which I abhor, by the way)

Courage to speak truth in love in the right moments, rather than nodding my head and smiling.  

Courage to have peace with the fact that in ministry and in life, people will be critical.  And harsh.  I need courage to love them rather than appease them.

Courage to write again.  To write hard instead of over-censoring so that no one reads into something wrongly.  If they do...they do.  Courage.

Courage to obey boldly, rather than timidly or begrudgingly. 

Courage to be me.  The me who God has created, who He wants me to be and not who anyone else thinks I am.  

There's so many other areas I need courage.  I can't begin to know what year 36 will hold...I know that God shows me just a tiny glimpse because it's all my feeble heart and mind can handle.  But I feel that courage He's planted, like a small spark growing.  I'm gonna screw it up sometimes. Without a doubt.  But courage to fail is another area that needs some growth...

Life really is a beautiful mess.

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And She's Off...

Dear Lucy,

You had your first day of three year old preschool...almost two weeks ago.  I would have gotten to this post sooner, but you require a lot of energy to keep up with. Cleaning-up after you is literally my full-time job.  I know it means you're all kinds of genius.  

You had been so excited to go.  You even let me talk you into wearing the new bird dress...which is a feat for me.  You are highly opinionated on your fashion choices, a characteristic we both know comes from me.  Now, not only do I have to continue to harness my own will, but yours...and ours.  Tricky stuff.

You wanted me to stay with you.  No tears were shed though...just a stubborn expression on your sweet little face.  Your teacher knew just how to distract you so I could slip out.  And you were fine.  And I was fine.

She said you were her shadow, and she knew you were trying to figure out if you liked that place or not.  And you did like it. So very much. 

"I'm a big girl"  you keep telling me.  And I smile, because you are kind of a tiny old-soul in a little body with a blonde bob.  And I love you.

My prayer for you, my sweet little lulu, is that you allow God to use that independent spirit for His glory.   

Love,

Me

And this is the one where your brother photo-bombed.  Typical day.

 

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I Pick Theme Songs...

Rend Collective had been one of my new favorites this summer.  It's on about every play list I have.  It's helped me kick it in on the last mile of every.single.run since June.  (I'm on week 12 of half-marathon training, so it's a lot of running. More on that laterish)

And now I've adopted it as my official theme song for the year.  For me, my family, our church...you name it.

I also now feel the need to take up the tambourine.  And I have some boys that would be happy to play the thing that guy is pounding on the ground. I'm not quite sure our church is ready for that.  We'll just practice in secret for now.

 And Ben is most definitely getting a bow tie this fall.  

Packed full of so much truth.  It really is my heart wrapped up in a song written by people much cooler than I.  

That is why music is so darn cool.

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It's Good...

It's the first day of school here in tiny town.  You can't see me, but if you could:  I can't stop smiling.  And clapping and jumping up and down.

The kids were pretty happy too.  The truth is, we all know we need some structure and routine that involves more than annoying each other and Mincecraft.

Sixth. Fifth. Second.  

And Little Miss Lu will start 3 year old preschool on Friday.  

Maybe I should be sadder than I am.  But this stage in parenting is pretty neat.  And fairly enjoyable.  And while I'm sure the hardest years are still ahead of us (hello puberty)...the years are meant to come.  These kiddos are meant to grow and live life.  I mean, I'm sure I was a pretty rad 12 year old, but I'm pretty dang glad to have not stayed there.  So are my parents.

It's a gift to watch them grow.  It's a gift I'm not guaranteed or promised.  So, with each moment they grow, I'm going to embrace it the best I can.  And pray like crazy for God's grace to cover and fill and seep into every nook and cranny of all our lives.

And celebrate it with a venti iced caramel macchiato.  And two cake-pops.

Whatever.

And for the record:  I was a total rock-star mom today.  Got up early, made a healthy breakfast, remembered the First Day Photo shoot.  If only I could bottle me up to use again tomorrow...because it's likely that version of myself only shows up on First Days.

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Introverted Complications...

It turns out...that people who blog once a month are totally boring.  "Someone" needs to get with the program.  

This morning I scheduled all the kids doctor, dentist and eye appointments they need before going back to school.  I bought Jake a new backpack yesterday while I was at Target.  (I'm not sure the kid has had a new backpack ever) And some new socks.  Is it only July 16th?  Yes, yes it is.  Am I one of those moms who already wants to send her kids back to school?  

Kinda.

I kinda do.  

Or I need a vacation.  An alone vacation where I don't have to pick up after anyone or talk to anyone or listen to anyone. 

I need a break from the talkie.  Does anyone else need a break from the incessant talking?  There must be a support group or something...the "I Wish People Would Shut Up" club.  Kidding.  A little bit.

I can't seem to get away from people this summer.  You introverts will totally get what I'm saying...and you extroverts will think I'm being rude.  Ha.  I love people, I do.  But without regular breaks from them, I'm left depleted.  The tricky part is trying to figure out how to get a break without hurting peoples feelings...because there's lots of people and lots of needs.  

So in real life I'm hiding out for a bit.  Just a little bit.  And then I can like people again.  I just heard all the introverts say Amen.

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Currently...

Currently...

1. listening: To my washing machine, because it                           is 8:23 and all my children are still asleep.  Thank you Jesus.

2.  eating:  Black coffee.  It counts.

3.  drinking: Black coffee.

4. wearing: bermudas, blue v-neck, gray cardi & glasses.  Neither of which I wore yesterday or slept in so I call that a Summer Success.

5.  feeling:  Laid-back & caught-up.  

6. weather: Blue skies and a nice breeze and the humidity is pretty perfect today.  Iowa had redeemed itself.

7. wanting:  to paint the living room & office.  White.  It's happening this weekend.  Boo yah.  

8. needing:  to buy the boys shoes to wear to my nephew's wedding next weekend.  

9. thinking:  A lot of life happens in one little day.  

10. enjoying:   The quiet.  This post is finished and my kids are still sleeping.  Even the dog is still sleeping.  Best Day Ever.

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Killing May

May is sort of killing me.  It's like a million different things going on all the time.  

One of my favorite quotes is by John Owen  "Be killing sin or it will be killing you."  There's more to that quote, I cut the first part off.  Whatever, it's May and I have to hurry.

Point:  My new quote is "Be killing May or it will be killing you."

Seriously.

And what do you do, if you're me, and it's already a crazy/busy month?  You decide to paint things that don't actually have to be painted.

My theory is, if life is crazy, just go ahead and make it crazier.  Go big or go home.

Barstools...


And the front door.  It's navy...and hard to get a good pic of.



And we planted some flowers...

Jake had a spring concert so we dressed him up snazzy (in his Easter clothes) and he was adorable.

This is my extra annoyed fake smile because he wouldn't stop being so "adorable."

And this is my new favorite neon polka dotted shirt that I found on sale at the J Crew Factory store (online.)  If I could wear it every day I would.  I'm kidding.  I can wear it everyday and I will.  If something is dotted or striped or glittered it is automatically in my love pile.  

Did I mention that I am super happy that neon is back again.  It's like 7th grade all over again.  I'll try to avoid it from head to toe this time...but I make no promises.

We have our closing Bible Club program tonight (kids ministry) and then I will have officially "killed" May 8th.

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She's Like the Weather

On Tuesday this week it was 80 degrees out.  Today is Thursday, May 2nd and we have a Winter Weather Advisory until 6PM.  Get with the program Iowa, May is your redeeming month of the year.  

I don't care how many theories there are on global warming, I live in Iowa and it's May and IT IS SNOWING.  So yes, I mock you global warming. 



 On another note, Lucy has been crabtastic since the moment she woke up.  Crying and whining...non stop.  I had one of those really great parenting moments where I said "STOP CRYING!"  which of course made her cry and cry and cry some more.  And then, for a moment,  I sort of wished I worked outside the home so I could get her dressed and drop her off at the babysitters. 

I'm kidding.  It was waaaay longer than a moment that I thought on that idea.  Because there are days and moments where I want to trade one set of trials for a new set of trials...

But either way, there will be trials.  

So today I will endure the endless whining, and tantrum throwing.  The demands, the time-outs, and the potty training.  Because in between all that, she crawls up next to me and says, "Mom, I loooooove you."  and "I snuggle you" and "Mom, your hair is crazy."  

She's right, my hair is crazy.  

And tomorrow...she'll likely pop out of that bed with smiles and giggling.  





Her moods change like Iowa's weather.    

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Life in Random

Let's Random, shall we?

• It's March 11th and we have, yet again, another snow day.  It hurts.  Is it possible to overdose on Vitamin D supplements? In my head I keep chanting, spring is coming spring is coming spring is coming.  Because it has to.
• Lucy is going to be three next month.  Wow.  She loves Dora, Strawberry Shortcake and most recently:  Spiderman.  I love being home with her...even on the days that she makes me crazy.  
• I have a new baby niece named Ella.  She is the cutest.

• We have been watching The Bible on the History channel on Sunday nights.  The boys love it.  It's been a great opportunity for dialogue with them.  They get annoyed with us pausing it all the time to tell them background info or to explain that certain parts of the movie didn't really happen like that.  But it's the perfect opportunity to see the Bible come to life and fill in truth in their lives.  
• 
  

Spring is coming.  Right?

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Eleven Days

Eleven days since my last post, yet it feels like I've lived eleven months worth of stuff in that time.

(Actually, it's now 14 days since my last post.  I started this one three days ago and then something else *hit the fan* so to speak.)  So it's a little inaccurate now.  Whatever.

*Deep, deep sigh*

Today all the kids are finally back to school and the flu has hopefully left our house for good.  

We had an ice storm, and then last night we had a thunderstorm.  In January. Weird.  It's like the weather is matching all the other crazy stuff going on.

(No worries though, because we also had a snow storm and school was cancelled three days this week...that's just part of the update for you.  Confused yet?  I am.)

Our tiny little church was a part of two funerals in the past two weeks.  

And some things you think would never happen.  Happen.

And you pray.  And pray and pray and pray some more.

Because life sometimes...well, it's terribly messy.  And hard.  And sometimes walking with people through their hard stuff brings a unique kind of pain.  

And sometimes you just want to blame it on the terrible month of January, and let yourself believe that if you can just make it to February 1st, it will be better.

Because maybe it will.  

A few weeks ago, I came across this verse from our Bible Study and although I'd heard it before, I heard it that time in a new way.

John 16:33

New International Version 1984 (NIV1984)

³³ “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Jesus sets the bar at trouble.  "You will have trouble"  Period.  It's like He said to me, expect it.  Don't be shocked, and certainly stop trying to live life in ways to avoid the trouble.  Life is trouble.  But Jesus has told me the things I need to know and hear, so that I can have peace.  And then He gives a big, fat, fresh dose of perspective by reminding me that these current troubles, are just itty bitty in the scheme of things.  

Big picture:  He has overcome the world.

The world, and all the crap that it has to offer and throw at me...I can deal with because of Jesus.  

He has won already.  

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Currently

Currently...


Listening:  To Cinderella...Lucy's watching it in the other room.

Eating:  Nutella.  Lots and lots of Nutella.

Drinking:  Black Coffee.  

Wearing:  The shirt I wore yesterday, slept in, and still currently have on.  Someone needs to shower yet.  Someone also has to get out of the habit of sleeping in their clothes.  

Feeling:  Peaceful.  In the last several months, with some Holy Spirit nudging, I re-evaluated my things, relationships, habits, thoughts, emotions, and made some changes.  At the time,it was less than pleasant but I'm beginning to see why God caused the shake-up...things were out of whack and now it is much, much better.  Whoever said 'No Pain No Gain' was totally right.

Weather:  This week has been warm.  Because 35 in January in Iowa is warm.

Wanting:  Spring to come quickly.

Needing:  To keep my eyes on Jesus.

Thinking:  I should get in the shower...

Enjoying:  Hanging out everyday with my Lucy.  She's a hoot.

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Today

Because someday I might want to remember what I did today.  Or not.  Whatever, at least it's a post.

• Woke up at 5:45 to run with Billlie.  Hadn't run since before Christmas and it was freeeezing out and we sorta slid all over but it's still better than the treadmill!  This months marks 6 years we've been running together.  That's just craziness.  I ordered new running shoes from Eastbay.  I've been having hip flexor issues so I stretched today.  Yay me.
• In our house, we say "Yay!" and "Woo Hoo!" after stuff.  And by we, I mean me.  And now Lucy.  It cracks me up.
• Boys had their first day back to school after Christmas break.  Everyone was rip-roaring ready to go, which surprised me.  Apparently we've had enough "together" time.
• Spent time thinking about my friend Steph, and her son Tate.  Today marks two years in Heaven for Tate...and he's missed terribly.
• Loaded up Lucy and her buddy Ryder and we headed to the town where our bank resides and then went to Wal-Mart (which I loathe but it was early and it was ok and there is no Target there.)  While there I decided we should probably get a new printer/scanner/copier because ours is eight years old now and super moody.  Plus it was reasonably priced and the ink was way cheaper than our current old model.  I went with an HP again because DUDE, the last one lasted EIGHT YEARS!  Plus, it said it was wireless and that just makes me happy.
• Drove through McDonald's and got coffee and cookies. (3 cookies for $1 is amazing if you ask me.)  The kids didn't want the cookies.  Their loss, my gain.  Literally.
• Came home and fixed computer all.by.myself.  Our laptop battery had died awhile ago so per my brothers instructions I ordered one from Amazon because they are dirt cheap.  Thank you China.  Anyways, the battery worked but would not charge.  So I Googled, and uploaded new BIOS (no idea what that is) and BAM problem fixed.  Yay!  Woo HOO!
• Then I set up the new printer.  All. by. myself.  So what if it took all day... I was also caring for some preschoolers.  Multi-tasking at its finest.
• Drank a Pepsi.
• Combed Lucy's hair.
• Meanwhile I kept calling Ben to inform him of my progress because I knew he'd be so super impressed with my skills.  
• Took Nelson out in the frigid cold to pee approximately 8 times.  He hates the cold.
• Did some laundry...it's still sitting in the baskets, but it's clean.
• Pondered grief for a bit and realized that I have a lot to learn about life from my 11 year old.  He celebrates his friends life, and misses him, but he doesn't dwell on what could have been...because he accepts what is.  He reminds me where Tate is, and Heaven is perfection. And he smiles when he talks about him, because he's taking Tate with him until they meet again, where they'll play video games for eternity.  
• Made supper.  Frozen, breaded parmesan chicken breast things that are basically glorified chicken nuggets.  But with some cheese and buffalo sauce they are gourmet.  Oh, we also had instant mashed potatoes because we are healthy like that.
• Thought about how I need to start potty training Lucy.  And then decided to procrastinate.
• Started cleaning off the desk, and then got distracted by blogging.
• Blogged.
• New book came in the mail from Amazon.  Now I have two I need to start. ASAP.
• Just remembered that Eli has basketball practice in 45 minutes.  
• Getting off the computer.

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